I thought Id post chapter one of the book Im writing for anyone who has too much time on their hands or interests in reading/writing. also, any contructive critisism and the like would be appreicated.
Warning: not a sci-fi theme.
Where light doesn├óÔé¼Ôäót fall
PROLOUGE: The declaration of war
I have failed at life as I sought it, and all I am left with is cold obsession. Control. Manipulating variables, people, minutely and watching how the long chain of process is moulded exponentially as the variables effect themselves, each other and everything else until the end output shows the huge variance caused by the smallest change. How the slightest change in a facial expression can completely change another├óÔé¼Ôäós. Behaviour is a very powerful weapon if wielded correctly.
Trent paused and scanned the last paragraph intently for several minutes, correcting several grammatical errors and in places where his handwriting was too illegitimate lengthened strokes to make the characters clearer. Trent was desperate to transfer his last hope to paper but re-reading what he├óÔé¼Ôäód written he screwed it up and pulled another piece of lined paper from his pad and began writing again. The biro kept playing up and Trent swore and snapped it, and went searching around under his bed for another one. Finding a small, unexplained gathering of biros, Trent selected another black one and sat up and started to transcribe his intentions again.
Normal, unrefined behaviour is of little use, for every move towards something definitive is negated by an act of communication or body language suggesting conformity to a general set of unspoken rules of our society├óÔé¼┬ª everyone yearns for peace, prosperity and personal comfort. When an individual, a prodigy, has personal agendas not following with any of the above and abilities to influence others, you see charismatic leaders like Hitler grow. Hitler was not just memorable for the atrocities he committed, but for the way he was able to push himself from one poor living man to a one-man leader to millions, and how he was able to force them to fanatical ends and to serve his terrible whims. Without a prevailing goal, Hitler would never have gone anywhere. The best illustration of the importance of a prevailing purpose would be to start several projectiles from a single point, all of them travelling in random directions and continuously changing speed and heading, except one which moves constantly towards a point. After a time, Measurement will show the projectile will purpose will have moved closest to the point.
Trent pushed the paper back and studied what he├óÔé¼Ôäód written. Abstract, Pretentious garbage most of it, but it expressed the point at hand: ambition and means. Trent had never found anything he was particularly skilled at; he was simply competent to a degree in everything. This had left him without any real hobby or direction, because being exceptional at nothing caused him to develop no real interests. The only thing Trent had left was a fascination with planning. I am invisible, thought Trent; I have no talent, no exceptional feature. I am not particularly handsome, sharp, intelligent, charismatic, strong, fast or brutal. I am a self-confessed coward and I go weak at the knees and fidget and find it hard to speak at even the threat of violence, from a youth half my size. I am 17, white, brown haired and common looking. I am in love with a tall dark skinny girl, Erin, who is a temptress, a sadistic bitch who loves to watch me sob on the floor. All I have left is the dark energy of revenge, pent up hatred at what I have become and those who drove me here. I am arrogant and pretentious but I am going to try and lose that. After a life lived walking in fear and shadows I want to just once be proud of my name.
This land will become my purpose. These dank fenlands my purpose, these miserable, bitter, stupid people will become my charges. My life may be meaningless, but I can give meaning to others people├óÔé¼Ôäós lives. Hope. We may be doomed to misery but that doesn├óÔé¼Ôäót mean our successors should be.
There is so much wrong to right but I have all the time in the world. I have access to natural conscripts, to any information and technology I need. Those who darken the lives of myself and those that surround me will learn to fear.
Trent knew where so many people who did powerful things to express themselves went wrong. They used things out of their experience, which resulted in them not playing the game to the full level of skill required: In short, they were lost in the deep end and they generally failed and were arrested or condemned to failure. People opposing robbery and murder had generations of experience and a huge budget and people who were calm, intelligent and armed with the most effective technology available, whereas the people they opposed were always ill equipped and unaware of what they were facing. Trent was going to stick exactly to what he knew to achieve his aims: Fens. Stupidity. Fear. Boredom. Idiots. Body language. He was going to use people he had grown up with his whole life, the generations still above the law, to achieve goals he and such people would understand in manners they understood.
No, Trent knew exactly what he wanted to do. So many people who wronged him. Trent hated all of them. Wanted to see them hurt. Maybe even die. Trent grimaced in thought and turned on his desk chair to face the computer on the table next to his desk, opened a blank word document and after staring at the blank white screen for several minutes slowly tapped out several lines:
Charismatic leadership:
1) Self-belief is a fundamental need of leaders.
2) People follow others they personally admire and who make them feel important.
3) Respect is formed through personal risk taking and sacrifice, and performing unconventional behaviour.
Monitor light from the computer in the growing dark lit a sliver of Trent├óÔé¼Ôäós face. With his slim face mostly cast in shadow from his prominent cheekbones, and his eyes submerged in shadow, he looked demonic. Trent flicked his head back to shift several brown spikes of hair from his face and smiled darkly at the blazing writing.
CHAPTER I: Nothing to do and Nothing to be
College can be a horrible place to be if you can├óÔé¼Ôäót cope. Even being a professor asking you a question and making you the centre of attention causes you to sweat and flush as you feel you have to reply in a manner that├óÔé¼Ôäós intelligent and humorous or be looked down upon by the rest of the students. Everything becomes and obstacle and the whole college day becomes a race of endurance. Trent Hated College. With oddly exceptional grades leaving secondary school seeing most of his summer revision had been spent running round Cambridge city centre dressed as a pirate shouting Nautical obscenities and making a documentary on piracy, he opted to go to The snobbiest college in the district which had a very high grade boundary under the impression it would be the best way to escape from all the thuggish idiots that had dogged him most his life and start somewhere new without having to constantly evade beatings.
This turned out to be one of the most dubious decisions he ever made, college turned out to be horrible, full of ugly, snobbish and unpleasant snide people. Trent naturally lost contact with most his friends but still heard haunting stories of the parties down at long road where all his friends were having the best time of their lives. Bloody typical, Trent├óÔé¼Ôäós new start pretty much turned him into a bitter husk of his old self.
Trent survived at in this environment of bitterness and strain (because college pushed students so hard at lords College that most were constantly inches from nervous breakdown, the college argued against this that their pass rates were sky high but lords leavers were desiccated husks of people by leavers) that was his weekdays by keeping constant momentum.
Monday morning, sometime near mid autum, Trent opened his eyes, rolled over and grabbed his watch, 6.45, rolled unto his back and did 30 sit-ups still under the cover swearing under his breath. 6.50 sprang out of bed, moved to the wardrobe across the room, pretty cold so make that four layers and two pairs of socks, scruffy black cargo pants, pull them on and without stopping push open bedroom door and made breakfast silently with perfect timing. Muffins in toaster, eat yoghurt, turn on kettle, muffins pop, butter muffins, eat muffins, kettle clicks, cup of tea, remaining hot water on weetabix (instead of microwaving, to save time.) eat weetabix, drink tea while filling thermo flask with coffee, brush teeth over ------- sink, rinse face with tap water, run wet hands through hair to ensure it dries pushed away from face, grab bag, walk out time 7.10 and another job well done.
I should buy a coat, thought Trent, walking at great speed, and pulled a grey furry hat from his rucksack and jammed it on his head where it looked pretty awful, and walked faster; the bus left at 7.20 and it would take 5 minutes to get there, leaving 5 minutes for distractions, like-
├óÔé¼┼ôAlright!├óÔé¼┬Ø came a cheery voice and Trent span to walk backwards, and then stopped seeing it was Jonnie B. Jonnie B was an old school friend who also had to catch the same early bus.
├óÔé¼┼ôHey, bloody cold├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent replied shivering now he wasn├óÔé¼Ôäót moving.
├óÔé¼┼ôNah, I├óÔé¼Ôäóm pretty good, you should buy a coat├óÔé¼┬Ø Jonnie B was quite a broad guy and had a belly to boot, although to be fair he had thinned out a lot since the start of secondary school. He had as Alan would have said ├óÔé¼┼ôplenty to love├óÔé¼┬Ø and it was the perfect climate for it. Jonnie B was friendly company but he was a complete coward and a bit naive.
├óÔé¼┼ôNo need to rub it in yeah?├óÔé¼┬Ø Jonnie B caught up and Trent walked with him the rest of the way up the lane. It was the only dirt road in Barnwell, surrounded on both sides by brambles but it was a convenient shortcut as long as it wasn├óÔé¼Ôäót too wet the night before, in which case it became a muddy death trap instead. ├óÔé¼┼ôDid you hear that thunder last night? Kept me up late till past three...├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent sighed and stopped to empty his shoe. ├óÔé¼┼ôYeah├óÔé¼┬Ø.
Trent arrived with Jonnie B in tow with several long minutes to spare before the bus was due. I really don├óÔé¼Ôäót want any conversations with these people, Trent thought tiredly as he began to scrape the mud off his jeans with some crumpled lined paper from his bag, It├óÔé¼Ôäós really going to be one of those days, when everything is precisely and minutely timed to get me down.
The bus stop was on the long causeway that ran straight through the town. The bus took a looping route, passing this point before circling the worst estates and the coop and the far end before pulling back up towards Trent├óÔé¼Ôäós bus stop and civilisation. Being the best bus stop in the village as it provides two separate chances of catching the bus if its running slightly late or early, there was the usual small crowd of people Trent knew and hated at this small hour.
├óÔé¼┼ôWow, honey that hat really looks awful, Have you been robbing the homeless again?├óÔé¼┬Ø a female voice said in an amused chuckle from somewhere to his rear. Trent did a slow turn on the spot and glared at Haley, a small slim pale girl with a strong jaw and a mass of brown hair├óÔé¼┬ª almost pretty, but not quite. He was slightly surprised she always managed such high spirits between her family and getting up before the sun but its always comforting to have someone around to be irritatingly happy so Trent decided to let the offence pass ├óÔé¼┼ôYeah, your dad picked the wrong place to fall asleep├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent snapped crudely then gave a lopsided smile. ├óÔé¼┼ôHow├óÔé¼Ôäós it going at home? Your brother?├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent said softly. It was a delicate topic, but she needed to talk to someone about it. Trent had been hoping shed get a good boyfriend soon who├óÔé¼Ôäód sort her out but this just didn├óÔé¼Ôäót seem to be happening and it was dawning on Trent that this, along with pretty much everything was his problem. Trent sighed inwardly as her face fell. Not a good sign. At least I keep it all inside, he thought looking up to see the bus turning into the stop. Trent looked down and rummaged through his purse (├óÔé¼┼ôNice purse!├óÔé¼┬Ø laughed Scotty ├óÔé¼┼ôPercy!├óÔé¼┬Ø) for his peeling bus pass.
Trent elbowed beside Scotty and Haley, and pushed in front of the other eight or so people glaring tiredly at their backs; some traditions didn├óÔé¼Ôäót fade with age. Trent disliked catching this bus, because far too many people from his secondary school who had spent previous years trying to hospitalise him generally caught it too. Trent had changed a fair bit since, being about a foot taller but he figured they would always see him as a target. As a result, after the driver nodded him past, Trent walked up to the top story with his eyes narrowed and blazing fanatically. The best way to discourage anyone looking for an easy target is to look like you├óÔé¼Ôäóve already fought most people from here to Nottingham and sure enough the worst he got was a contemptuous glance a cruel laugh as someone stuck out a leg to trip Trent which he promptly trod on. Looks like I├óÔé¼Ôäóve outgrown these guys thought Trent. Finally.
Trent made his way to the back of the bus and slung his bag into the foot space and crashed into an empty seat. After re-arranging, Trent pulled his legs in and sat semi-reclined with his legs up and crossed against the neck rest of the seat in front, just in time for Haley to slump down next to him. ├óÔé¼┼ôUrgh, not you again├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent groaned but gave it away with another slanted smile. Haley she didn├óÔé¼Ôäót react, she just kept staring straight ahead with a contained expression ├óÔé¼┼ôYou want to talk about it?├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent stared at her, analysing the side of her face for some kind of emotion. She was wearing too much makeup as usual and there were unattractive tired dark patches under her eyes ├óÔé¼┼ôYou look like hell, what├óÔé¼Ôäós happened?├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent added rather undiplomatically but with a slight undertone of care. Haley somehow caught unto the caring slip and smiled slightly, turning to face Trent. ├óÔé¼┼ôMy brother has started on harder stuff├óÔé¼┬ª he├óÔé¼Ôäós a lost cause Trent. He├óÔé¼Ôäós been expelled and has managed to convince the services that he├óÔé¼Ôäós being tutored at home by mum, which of course he├óÔé¼Ôäós not├óÔé¼┬Ø she took a steadying breath ├óÔé¼┼ôHe spends most his time at the abandoned factories at the end of town I think, that├óÔé¼Ôäós where most the dealing happens. I think he might deal, I don├óÔé¼Ôäót see how he could pay for his habit just with what he steals from the family. Anyway, he came home in a tripping rage last night, it was much worse than usual. Mother had found a bag of cannabis under his bed and taken it away. When he found out he went berserk. He...he s-started...he...├óÔé¼┬Ø Haley ground her teeth angrily at her weakness and the brightness went back out of her eyes. Trent waited silently as she continued. ├óÔé¼┼ôDaddy is out on a business trip in France for another nine days, and we cant call the police or social services again after last time.├óÔé¼┬Ø Last time Trent recalled the story, had concluded with the social services threatening to kick Haley├óÔé¼Ôäós father out the house if he touched the brother again. ├óÔé¼┼ôHe...he beat my mother with the piece of wood he keeps from his doorframe.. She was on the floor crying and he just├óÔé¼┬ª b-beat the shit out of her├óÔé¼┬Ø Haley sniffed but pushed on ├óÔé¼┼ôI t-tried to help him but he kicked me in the stomach and I think I must have collapsed, when I came to I was alone in the house├óÔé¼┬ª├óÔé¼┬Ø she stopped and looked at Trent├óÔé¼Ôäós unwavering expression. ├óÔé¼┼ôI just don├óÔé¼Ôäót know how much longer I can take it├óÔé¼┬Ø she said haltingly then looked down.
Trent looked out the window, gauged they were about ten minutes down with fifty left and turned to face the bus├óÔé¼Ôäós occupants. Everyone was sitting in varying states of dazed quietness; even the locals weren├óÔé¼Ôäót putting in any petty bullying. he turned back to Haley and looked at her for half a minute. Tears were now dripping off the end of her upturned nose. Trent thought hard and suppressed his distaste for the bus├óÔé¼Ôäós occupants. After a brief grounding of teeth, Trent waveringly put an arm around her shoulders and she jerkily sunk her face into his shoulder and sobbed very quietly. Trent looked down at the back of her head and neck where she her hair tied up impeccably. This was the worst he├óÔé¼Ôäód ever seen from her, she├óÔé¼Ôäód never cried in public before. Trent bit back his angry expletive and awkwardly rubbed her side. ├óÔé¼┼ôIt├óÔé¼Ôäóll be okay├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent murmured to her in the full knowledge it wouldn├óÔé¼Ôäót be. It wouldn├óÔé¼Ôäót be so bad but Haley really still cared for her brother regardless of his treasonous acts. The only thing that would stop his habit now was not being able to get his hands on the drug for love or money. ├óÔé¼┼ôIt├óÔé¼Ôäóll be okay├óÔé¼┬Ø
After ten minutes or so Haley recovered her composure and sat up, her jaw tense and looking straight ahead. Trent squeezed her hand and turned to look out the grimy bus window. It was autumn and the air was so cold that even the heat it gained for the duration it was in his body wasn├óÔé¼Ôäót enough to make his breath steam up the window. Trent idly watched the fens blur past in thought. Small, shop-less town. Boggy farm. Run down church. Desolate school grounds. More Boggy farms. Everything looked grey and hopeless, no past or future, just endless dreary fens. After a while, the same-ness of the scenery caused Trent to phase out and he began to think unhindered by passing scenery. Haley was cracking up and it was only the start of the problems if her brother had just started on the next tier of drugs. Trent thought hard about the problem, and only saw one real solution: Without the influence of the drugs all the scum would be forced to reform├óÔé¼┬ª their ├óÔé¼┼ôsocial├óÔé¼┬Ø group at the factory is only held together by drugs├óÔé¼┬ª without drugs as a point they had in common they would be aimless and drift apart├óÔé¼┬ªfind an alternate occupation, probably nothing too decent but less destructive to their families and those around them, hell maybe even the stupid thuggery on the streets would lessen├óÔé¼┬ª and Haley might still be able to survive the year and get to university├óÔé¼┬ª its hardly my job to sort things out but there isn├óÔé¼Ôäót anyone else around who can stand up for her. There├óÔé¼Ôäós nothing to be helped or achieved by assaulting her brother as he├óÔé¼Ôäós on drugs and lives a hard life anyway, and his friends are a lot harder than me anyhow├óÔé¼┬ª the problem stemmed from the place where he could meet others like himself and justify his lifestyle and hell, being alive. The abandoned factory is a haven of drugs, violence and other unpleasantries. Police are not the solution; they are terrible at this kind of thing├óÔé¼┬ª social services support these people over their parents. To stop people taking drugs, the drugs would have to become unavailable. Everyone knows a dealer, but nobody would ever call police down on someone they know├óÔé¼┬ª what├óÔé¼Ôäós needed is a real bastard to gather up evidence then bomb them all together. But whoever did that would probably end up stabbed in some alley. It├óÔé¼Ôäós a real problem, Trent thought to himself.
Trent was interrupted from his train of thought by a thrown plastic bottle ricocheting off the side of his head. It was empty but it still stung like the blazes and Trent├óÔé¼Ôäós head whipped around to find the culprit and sure enough the local boys, all had thuggish smiles on their faces though they were not looking back at him, rather across the isles at each other. There were five of them, and Trent counted one of himself so there wasn├óÔé¼Ôäót too much he could really do even if he was brave enough to face the consequences except sit and shake with impotent anger and fear. Trent thought getting older would let him grow away from these people but it seemed he was cursed to live among them forever. Trent barely turned to look out the window when another bottle hit and he span round eyes bright and said loudly ├óÔé¼┼ôWho threw that bottle!├óÔé¼┬Ø The guys all turned to look at him with malicious smiles. ├óÔé¼┼ôDon├óÔé¼Ôäót know mate, sorry├óÔé¼┬Ø laughed tom, the smallest of the group. ├óÔé¼┼ôOne of you did! I saw you!├óÔé¼┬Ø he said, fidgeting slightly with his hand and going slightly red in the face. ├óÔé¼┼ôWho threw it!?├óÔé¼┬Ø They just gave him another round of mocking smiles before turning round. Trent spent the rest of the bus journey cooling in the sweat from the encounter and kept one eye on the group. Trent was furious with himself. I├óÔé¼Ôäóm such a damn coward he thought to himself, I think I don├óÔé¼Ôäót care about anything then these guys still have the ability to show me up. It├óÔé¼Ôäós almost a trained response. Trent thought on along these lines and seethed with anger and self-pity for several long minutes until a cool hand slipped into his and gave his hand a good squeeze. Trent turned round; his eyes still bright and then slowly cooled again in Haley├óÔé¼Ôäós composed gaze. ├óÔé¼┼ôIt├óÔé¼Ôäóll be okay?├óÔé¼┬Ø she said with a hint of a smile ├óÔé¼┼ôThanks Haley├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent said after a minute, and detached his hand ├óÔé¼┼ôBut when someone comforts you its not cricket to mock their efforts afterwards however pitiful├óÔé¼┬Ø. ├óÔé¼┼ôSorry├óÔé¼┬Ø she replied ├óÔé¼┼ôdefensive mechanism?├óÔé¼┬Ø ├óÔé¼┼ôI don├óÔé¼Ôäót think so├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent pulled out his chipped thermo-flask and calmed himself with a mug of sugary coffee.
├óÔé¼┼ôShow me the bruise where he kicked you Haley.├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent said suddenly after a minute. She looked up shocked and whispered quickly ├óÔé¼┼ônot here!├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent├óÔé¼Ôäós expression didn├óÔé¼Ôäót change and his eyes bore into her. Haley scowled and her brow knitted, but she slowly put her bag on her lap to shield herself from view and lifted up her shirt and coat. Trent followed her progress with his eyes and while a passive part of his brain noted it was instantly silenced when he saw the bruise.
The wolf stirred.
It was slightly to the right of her ribs, nearer Trent and he stared at it for several seconds then turned away and out the window and she dropped the layers again. ├óÔé¼┼ôJesus, he almost killed you├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent breathed. The bruise was about 9├óÔé¼┬Ø in diameter and flushed a dark purple. ├óÔé¼┼ôJesus.├óÔé¼┬Ø
Trent passed the remainder of the journey in comfortable silence. Haley started dozing with her head on Trent├óÔé¼Ôäós shoulder and Trent stared out the grimy window at the grimy scenery and grimy sky with mounting distaste. It must be this land, Trent thought. It was never meant for human colonisation. We stole if from the sea with technology, but hell the sea can have it back, this place is a miserable hellhole. The cold, the rain and the lack of social locations means most people here just drown their sorrows with cheap beer and cannabis rather than face their surroundings. After a quantity of time Trent lost track of, the bus had stopped moving. Trent ruffled Haley├óÔé¼Ôäós hair till she woke up grumbling, and they pushed off their seat and joined the shuffling advance towards the bus exit. Trent stepped out into the cold morning air, and looked up at lords and felt nothing. St lords, the prestigious 6th form college of Cambridge looked like a castle that became a mansion that became a school, all held together with elegant brickwork and a huge savings account. It was almost all buildings, blocks of classrooms, there was little in the way of greenery and no green to sit on, just concrete and benches. Students were encouraged to study instead of go to lunch, which didn├óÔé¼Ôäót help the general issues of social isolation, stress and depression, which a great majority of the students suffered from. Trent stood before the great masonry arch that was the entry to the central quad of St lords, and grimaced at the day that stood ahead. Haley caught up with him and pushed him from behind and not needing to be told twice Trent resumed his trudge.
├óÔé¼┼ôYo man├óÔé¼┬Ø Marcus half waved from the door of Trent├óÔé¼Ôäós maths classroom and Trent shouldered tiredly through the small gaggle of chatting maths students, or ├óÔé¼┼ôD├óÔé¼Ôäónerdz├óÔé¼┬Ø as Trent fondly called them, and made his way to Marcus.
├óÔé¼┼ôHey dude. Was there homework?├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent said wearily, gesturing towards the maths class.
├óÔé¼┼ôOh yeah, 34D, 34C, 36 A, B and C. About two hours work, you ain├óÔé¼Ôäót done it right?├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôRight.├óÔé¼┬Ø got better things to be doing thanks thought Trent to himself; the last thing I care about in the world is the art of numbers. Numbers are not relevant to any social mechanics. ├óÔé¼┼ôI├óÔé¼Ôäóm sure he wont care, Mr Johnson is such a pushover├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôUh Trent, wrong class├óÔé¼┬ª This one is for Mr Slater, and-├óÔé¼┼ô
├óÔé¼┼ôHe├óÔé¼Ôäós a steroid pumping body builder. Monday morning. That├óÔé¼Ôäós yeah just freaking great. Can I uh-├óÔé¼┼ô
├óÔé¼┼ôSorry man├óÔé¼┬Ø Marcus replied with a chuckle ├óÔé¼┼ôTime to go in.├óÔé¼┬Ø
After the initial row over Trent├óÔé¼Ôäós appalling homework excuse for failing to even look at the homework, maths settled into its normal state. The bulky, shouting professor walked to and fro franticly drawing complex algebra over the whiteboard with elaborating notes while Trent let all the shouted explanations waft over him and copied it all down into note form to look at another time. The one good thing Trent discovered about this was that he could generally unconsciously recall what the details of a lesson, so as long as he took decent notes he could use the lesson as an hour of thought time to reflect and plan.
├óÔé¼┼ôThe e function is the unique number which in the formula Y=e^x has the same curve as its own gradient├óÔé¼┬ª├óÔé¼┬Ø The professor├óÔé¼Ôäós speech cut through Trent├óÔé¼Ôäós thought but with effort he tuned it out into background noise and the volume of the professors deductions dropped away. Trent stole a glance to his right where Marcus sat watching Mr Slater├óÔé¼Ôäós progress around the room. Marcus was an okay kind of guy, certainly one of the few from St lords he could endure the company of but he wasn├óÔé¼Ôäót exactly a friend├óÔé¼┬ª he couldn├óÔé¼Ôäót imagine Marcus going out on a limb to help him├óÔé¼┬ª Marcus didn├óÔé¼Ôäót care about much at all, so Trent figured he could just stay as his useful work companion. He didn├óÔé¼Ôäót bother looking at the rest of the class, they consisted of people who were truly interested in the mechanics of maths, and who were either male or seriously unattractive, so instead he turned to face the board with a glazed eye look of concentration. Trent had chosen to sat at the desk nearest the board for just this reason: professors looked for trouble at the back of rooms where troublemakers usually sat, and generally thought people at the front of the room were concentrating, and hence never asked them questions to catch them off guard. ├óÔé¼┼ôDifferentiate this function now with your graphical calculators├óÔé¼┬ª├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent lifted his calculator to eye level and hammered the buttons mechanically as the professors gaze swept over them, then dropped the calculator facing Marcus, who read ├óÔé¼┼ôP(5-K1((-M3├óÔé¼┬Ø and laughed and turned his calculator to face Trent. It read ├óÔé¼┼ô0mG35-1-g0774-m337-50m1-(0(├óÔé¼┬Ø. Trent shook his head with quiet amusement.
Marcus was actually a pretty unusual person, as he almost never showed any interest or emotion to pretty much anything. Trent tried to admire him for that, but failed and decided he must just have a pretty boring life. Marcus had resumed paying attention to the lesson Trent noted in disgust and went back to thinking about Haley├óÔé¼Ôäós brother. He hangs out with all the hardcore druggies├óÔé¼┬ª ├óÔé¼┼ôHow does this graph vary from e^2x├óÔé¼┬ª├óÔé¼┬Ø They weren├óÔé¼Ôäót directly linked to the people Trent hated and feared├óÔé¼┬ª ├óÔé¼┼ôYes, the gradient halves├óÔé¼┬ª├óÔé¼┬Ø so maybe I could face them without a lapse to pathetic cowardice Trent thought, it├óÔé¼Ôäóll be like a warm up├óÔé¼┬ª but some warm-up, they were probably the most dangerous group for 10 miles in any direction. Still they have weaknesses, it├óÔé¼Ôäós just a matter of exploiting├óÔé¼┬ª but what and how├óÔé¼┬ª Trent became lost in thought.
They behave illegally├óÔé¼┬ª that makes the police a valid solution. They are all very stupid├óÔé¼┬ª Trent couldn├óÔé¼Ôäót see a way of manipulating this directly except cheating them out of money, or something, but maybe it would make them less effective at reacting to any form of attack├óÔé¼┬ª they fight all the time with each other and others, many go to the boxing club├óÔé¼┬ª that just means that whatever the solution was to removing the group, it hopefully didn├óÔé¼Ôäót involve violence. Violence including himself, Trent corrected, as other people could be used in roles involving a broken face. They smoke all the time├óÔé¼┬ª so they should be quite unfit and incapable of running for long periods. Makes sense, and means that he could hopefully outrun the group├óÔé¼┬ª ├óÔé¼┼ôTrent, what does doubling the power do to the gradient├óÔé¼┬ª?├óÔé¼┬Ø now, are the benefits of taking such risks enough to outweigh the chances of a very real beating or stabbing-
├óÔé¼┼ôTrent!├óÔé¼┬Ø boomed professor Slate with annoyance.
├óÔé¼┼ôAHH! Er I mean, ah, I er sorry sir was just thinking├óÔé¼┬ª├óÔé¼┬Ø Oh crap! Trent thought. Brain, do your thing├óÔé¼┬ª ├óÔé¼┼ô├óÔé¼┬ªI├óÔé¼Ôäód make that to be increasing the gradient by uh, 2x2x2... eight. Sir.├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent finished quickly and gave a winning smile; ├óÔé¼┼ôVery good, and now, Goldberg, what does├óÔé¼┬ª├óÔé¼┬Ø ├óÔé¼┬ªThe terrible risk for the minimal chances of success makes it an unfeasible attack unless it confers another benefit├óÔé¼┬ª Trent thought tiredly and pulled the tattered lined paper from where it was hidden under his maths notes and read his previous attempts to articulate his thoughts:
2) People follow others they personally admire and who make them feel important.
3) Respect is formed through personal risk taking and sacrifice, and performing unconventional behaviour├óÔé¼┬ª
Trent thought briefly, his eyes staring through the whiteboard and meaningless algebra and ignoring the teachers continuing lecture he leant forward added to the sheet in biro:
Step one: Fostering respect
the first step to becoming a charismatic leader is to have purpose. People follow a leader, as he represents the means to and end. (Fulfilling said purpose.) Then, if he decides upon further goals, people are far more likely to support him. During this first effort, it is important to construct a consistent self-image, which others perceive, and to be consistent. Their respect would be cemented if leader takes the worst risks himself, tries to keep his companions out of danger, and performs successful unconventional behaviour.
Step one will be the removal of a common enemy: The shadows on the night streets. To acquire respect, the leader will take all the risks and do most of the work, but this must be witnessed by a suitably sized group (6+). This will mean rousing the group to this common cause by a process of:
1)Shared defeat
2)Shared anger
3)Proof/reconnaissance
4)An incremental plan (small steps of danger to decrease desertion)
5)An Impressive finale, leaving a conspicuous wake.
6)Exaggerated recollections by other members of the group generate prestige.
Trent stopped writing and rolled his black biro to the far side of his desk, and scanned through what he├óÔé¼Ôäód wrote with (difficulty, his handwriting hadn├óÔé¼Ôäót improved sadly) approval. It was scientific, almost military speak, devoid of emotion and it voiced a solid process. Not accounting for the human factors of all this at all naturally, but now, if he chose to (and Trent hadn├óÔé¼Ôäót yet, Trent had a good understanding of protecting his own skin) he had motives and method of beginning to attack the drug problem in Barnwell. It would only disable the Factory as a drug haven, and left the more difficult task of driving the dealers from the street corners, fields and caravans but Trent was confident. The people running the drug outfit were not older than about 19, and they were simply customers to another dealer: they had no power themselves. Satisfied, Trent slid the paper back under his notes and tried to pay attention to the lesson. The maths room was a solid rectangle, with various bright mathematics promoting posters ringing the walls. Did YOU know that with 20 people in a tube carriage, the chance of two or more people sharing a birthday is over 50%??? No, thought Trent. No I didn├óÔé¼Ôäót.
After the lesson, Trent saluted Marcus and walked quickly away from the maths classrooms, and dug his crumpled lesson timetable from his bag. After flattening it against his chest with one hand Trent held it close, then distant from his eyes squinting. The writing was so├óÔé¼┬ª illegible! Trent made a mental note to learn to write and realised, after a minute that he was looking at the wrong day and had a free period, an hour of free time.
├óÔé¼┼ôHi Trent!├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent looked up from his timetable into the smiling face of Carla, and felt annoyed already. Trent had always found something so despicable about people who could be happy in the mornings, but suppressed it in an attempt to be sociable. Carla was tall, clumsy and had long curly blonde hair, and was always happy. From Trent├óÔé¼Ôäós recollection of previous conversations where he had pretended to listen while saying ├óÔé¼┼ômmm├óÔé¼┬ª├óÔé¼┬Ø and ├óÔé¼┼ôuh-huh├óÔé¼┬Ø while counting backwards from one hundred, he remembered she was a drama student and spent all her time socialising or acting or singing. Trent had nothing in common with her which is probably why he always ended up stuck with her.
├óÔé¼┬ØHey Tyrone- I mean- Carla!├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôThat really isn├óÔé¼Ôäót funny you know.├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôYeah, I know but uh, how├óÔé¼Ôäós things?├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôGreat! I went to an artificial ski slope with my parents over the weekend, it was amazing!├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôUh-huh├óÔé¼┬Ø said Trent catching himself and forced out a better reply
├óÔé¼┼ôSounds fun, did you make a snowman? That├óÔé¼Ôäós a loaded question├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôUh, are you feeling- ├óÔé¼┼ôBZZZT! Your out!├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent declared over the top of her and continued before she could start again or realise he was making no sense. ├óÔé¼┼ôYou want to come for coffee? Guaranteed fun!├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôUm├óÔé¼┬ª Yeah, sure!├óÔé¼┬Ø she replied brightly and they pushed through the thinning crowds of people moving to their lessons to reach the cafe. She was endurable company and Trent figured he could probably do much worse on a Monday morning.
Trent sat next to her on the same side of a round table in the crowded caf├â┬® sipping a strong black coffee. It tasted pretty horrible but it smelt amazing and it packed a caffeine-plated punch that finished Trent├óÔé¼Ôäós waking up process. The caf├â┬® was full of all the most popular and social people in the school as ever; the level of noise from groups talking and laughing made it quite hard to be heard without shouting. Trent realised after several minutes that Carla was talking to him. Jesus, thought Trent I hate social situations.
├óÔé¼┼ôHow├óÔé¼Ôäós your girlfriend then?├óÔé¼┬Ø
Trent heard that clearly, and looked up into a grinning Carla.
├óÔé¼┼ôYou uh realise I don├óÔé¼Ôäót have one yeah?├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôReally?├óÔé¼┬Ø she said her face registering surprise ├óÔé¼┼ôI swear you were with that girl as well?├óÔé¼┬Ø
Ah yes Trent thought, ├óÔé¼┼ôNo├óÔé¼┬ª no, that girl decided she didn├óÔé¼Ôäót like me so much after all. She├óÔé¼Ôäós into punks or something.├óÔé¼┬Ø
That girl.
├óÔé¼┼ôThat├óÔé¼Ôäós a shame really. You know, I├óÔé¼Ôäóve met this boy, like met him at a club. He├óÔé¼Ôäós really sweet and-├óÔé¼┼ô
That girl.
├óÔé¼┼ôAnyway turns out he dropped out of school at 16, and is already earning ├é┬ú40,000 plus a year! Wow, talk about a catch! I mean, like how is that possible unless you├óÔé¼Ôäóre a genius, you├óÔé¼Ôäód almost think he wasn├óÔé¼Ôäót telling the-├óÔé¼┼ô
Trent felt the sound of conversations around him swelling and distorting, and he felt like there was a pressure pushing in around his temples and behind his eyes. Need space! Need air! Some primal part of his brain screamed over and over at him and after a formality of conversation, Trent excused himself to attend the toilet, rose, picked his way through the crowd and walked quickly down the long corridor to the gent├óÔé¼Ôäós toilets. It seemed to take an age but it was only seconds and he├óÔé¼Ôäód reached the swinging door and pushed through it, welcoming the rush of cold, disinfectant tinged air, several guys were standing at the sinks washing their hands and peering critically in the long wall mirror but Trent walked past them without looking at them, entered an empty cubical, locked it behind him and sat hugging himself on the seat with his head against the cold tile wall. After a moment of being dazzled by the overhead light, he closed his eyes. Trent├óÔé¼Ôäós face twitched and he shivered as his head spun and throbbed and context and place faded away.
After a while, Trent had no idea how long, he was aware of himself again and that he was shivering with cold. He groggily pulled his head back from the wall, opened his eyes and blinked, dazzled. After several bemused moments he lifted his arm to shield himself from the glare of the fluorescent bar light that half protruded over the top of the cubicle and waited for the dazzled blue dots to clear from his retina. Recognising his lapse as a breakdown caused by social pressure, conversation with a friend, Trent felt disgusted with himself. I├óÔé¼Ôäóm better than that, dammit! It was only a conversation with someone who doesn├óÔé¼Ôäót matter surrounded by people that don├óÔé¼Ôäót matter├óÔé¼┬ª why is there such a pressure of personality├óÔé¼┬ª Speech should flow organically; it shouldn├óÔé¼Ôäót be a result of desperate thought. One year is all it took Trent thought; One year has changed me into this pathetic person. NOT AGAIN! Trent thought forcefully, I├óÔé¼Ôäóve got a persona to breed├óÔé¼┬ª arrogance, self-confidence! Get up! Trent bent forward and closed his eyes tightly to fight the surge of nausea in his belly, then sat up eyes blazing and stared at his pale hands until they stopped quaking. If Trent was a little more honest with himself he might have admitted to himself that girl might have had some part in things too but he wasn├óÔé¼Ôäót and he was clenching his stomach muscles to steady himself and pulling open the cubical door.
Trent stood in the cubical doorway for several long seconds to get his bearings and noticed a mousy looking boy with wispy brown hair looking at him quizzically from just outside the door.
├óÔé¼┼ôAre uh, you okay?├óÔé¼┬Ø he asked after a while ├óÔé¼┼ôOnly you├óÔé¼Ôäóve been standing there for like a minute. You look pretty rough mate. And I really need to go, so-├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôRough?├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent demanded indignantly
├óÔé¼┼ôYeah. Like pale and strained?├óÔé¼┬Ø he replied slowly, and his face fell seconds later when he realised his observation didn├óÔé¼Ôäót bode well for his own time spent in Trent├óÔé¼Ôäós cubical. Trent caught this and grinned slightly. While he hadn├óÔé¼Ôäót used the cubical himself, he could sure tell the guy before him had.
├óÔé¼┼ôBlame it on last nights curry.├óÔé¼┬Ø
Trent shouldered past the fellow who entered his cubical behind him and walked to a sink and ran the freezing water over his hands. After the initial jarring shock Trent looked up from his dieing hands and looked into the long wall mirror for a moment. Hell! Trent thought and looked down again. He looked rough all right. He had large dark patches under both eyes like Haley had, a pale, dry face and narrowed red eyes. His hair looked normal, untidy brown spikes of hair in a short mop that normally looked fashionably unkempt, but with the rest of his appearance made him look like a tired mess. Trent sighed inwardly and turned to look at the man beside him, and gave an audible derisive chuckle. Trent didn├óÔé¼Ôäót mind, he felt 100% contempt for the blonde guy on the sink next to him who was critically looking in the mirror and wetting and styling his hair. Not a fault in his appearance. He was decked out in expensive, trendy clothes that screamed wannabe to Trent. A stripy long sleeved shirt with the collar up and tight jeans. He could hear R&B music coming from the headphones from his collar. What an idiot, Trent thought in amusement.
Trent walked past him to door, but was sent staggering forward by a hard push on the back of his shoulder. Trent checked his standing and spun round while backing up slightly, to face the blonde man who was now facing him, looking him up and down cold eyes. Trent felt a kick of fear in his gut.
├óÔé¼┼ôHave you got something you wanna say mate? The guy growled, running his hand through his hair. Several guys at the sinks and urinals turned their heads to watch, but Trent didn├óÔé¼Ôäót recognise any of them. Damn, Trent thought, think fast. He was tall, several inches taller than Trent, and much broader in the shoulder. He was wearing the trendy gear and there were people in the room like him that he wouldn├óÔé¼Ôäót want to lose face in front of. He is thinking right now, has weighed me up and decided I├óÔé¼Ôäóm a pale lanky nerd he can flatten. If I fight him and win, I will not benefit in anyway there is nobody who knows me to witness, will possibly get me in trouble with the college. I├óÔé¼Ôäóm also scared as hell, I├óÔé¼Ôäóm fidgeting with my hand and I├óÔé¼Ôäóm choked up and won├óÔé¼Ôäót be able to make a clever speech if I could freestyle one. But I can├óÔé¼Ôäót keep running forever, I├óÔé¼Ôäóve seen it catch up with me. On the other hand, getting beaten up in the crapper wont help things, I need to distract him for a second and leave. If I do it right, it├óÔé¼Ôäóll make me look good, daring, not like a coward. Well, thought Trent nervously, that works in films sometimes├óÔé¼┬ª
Only a second had passed. ├óÔé¼┼ôNope, But something tells me my friend does now...├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent said forced out his choked up throat threateningly, nodding towards an even bigger guy behind the offending man while forcing a contemptuous face he hoped looked natural. Trent felt the fear keep growing in his stomach, but for once things went perfectly. The challenger began to turn to look at where Trent nodded and the man he├óÔé¼Ôäód nodded at (who├óÔé¼Ôäód been watching Trent with disinterest) turned his head to look at the man turning to face him and it was a second before they both realised that Trent had quickly pushed through the door behind him and vanished.
Trent looked over his shoulder nervously and turned another corner and another, until with effort he stopped himself and stilled his nervous manner. Trent had been really frightened that he might have to fight, and worse fight the bigger guy for trying to drag him into it, but he was infinitely relieved to find they hadn├óÔé¼Ôäót been bothered to come after him. Seeing he├óÔé¼Ôäód stopped right opposite, Trent decided to wait the last few minutes between break at the infamous St Lords built in ├óÔé¼┼ôrestaurant├óÔé¼┬Ø, Porky Pete├óÔé¼Ôäós. Quite aside for the dire name, Porky Pete├óÔé¼Ôäós was also well known for causing conditions varying from mild flatulence to kidney failure with its varied selections of half cooked food. Trent had inexplicably become very attached to Porky Pete├óÔé¼Ôäós├óÔé¼┬ª Maybe it was the way the bacon was resistant to all but an over arm slam-dunk with the fork, maybe the way that the garlic bread was served in an airtight container for reasons that became obvious to anyone downwind within two miles├óÔé¼┬ª It was the kind of place where you only found people who skirted the crowds, diehards and outcasts, the brave men and women with Iron stomachs and Kevlar digestive systems
Trent walked in and spotted Marcus and Jason sitting at a grimy table at the back of the cafe. After buying several dangerous looking hash browns from a heavily built dinner lady (Trent remembered to smile but no extra portions were forthcoming today so he gave up), Trent looked up to spot them again and worked his way through the half deserted metal tables and irritatingly toe-stubbing fixed metal chairs and sunk into an uncomfortable angular seat opposite Marcus. Jason looked up from his packed lunch and broke into a hideous grin.
├óÔé¼┼ôAlright Trent! How├óÔé¼Ôäós stuff mo├óÔé¼Ôäó bruvva!├óÔé¼┬Ø he boomed. Trent cringed.
Jason was probably the most incompetent, socially inadequate person he├óÔé¼Ôäód ever met. He was fat, pale, spotty, stupid and without any grasp of social values such as inoffensive conversation. Generally if he spoke, trouble escalated from that point. It didn├óÔé¼Ôäót help that with his hair shaved short he looked like a gigantic baby. Trent was, as usual, wishing he wasn├óÔé¼Ôäót acquainted.
├óÔé¼┼ôUh, hey Jason-├óÔé¼┼ô
├óÔé¼┼ôYou gon├óÔé¼Ôäó share a hash brown with a homeboy?├óÔé¼┬Ø Jason blurted over the top, his piggy eyes fixed on the golden brown potato on Trent├óÔé¼Ôäós plate. Trent fixed him with a stare.
├óÔé¼┼ôI never have shared my food, I├óÔé¼Ôäóm not going to share my food, and I never will share my food- Hey! Mitts off faggot!├óÔé¼┬Ø Jason had begun to stretch a hand towards the hash browns anyway, so Trent threw a hard punch that glanced off Jason├óÔé¼Ôäós shoulder and to his credit Jason receded back into his chair moodily and resumed his lunch. Under the table Trent massaged his hand; He was confident he had injured himself far more than Jason├óÔé¼Ôäós Bony shoulder. Marcus looked up from the college paper he was in the process of reading.
├óÔé¼┼ôHeard about the college dance night?├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôUh...├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôSt Lords is renting the club on the millers road in a weeks time. Should be a good time.├óÔé¼┬Ø Marcus lifted the paper in demonstration, which showed a large illustration of several scantily clad girls dancing.
├óÔé¼┼ôIs it only St Lords people?├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent asked cautiously.
├óÔé¼┼ôYeah, probably├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôNot really a chance of there being any, for example, scantily clad girls that don├óÔé¼Ôäót make your eyes commit optical suicide then?├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôWell, Probably no. Should still be fun...├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôMm.├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent agreed indecisively. It didn├óÔé¼Ôäót sound like much fun.
├óÔé¼┼ôHey, you done the physics Coursework?├óÔé¼┬Ø Marcus asked in the superior tone he used when discussing work Trent hadn├óÔé¼Ôäót done.
├óÔé¼┼ôPhysics Coursework-?├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ô-Yeah. Write up of the practical on pressure?├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôI done it!├óÔé¼┬Ø Jason interjected
├óÔé¼┼ôUrgh. Things never get better.├óÔé¼┬Ø
Trent lifted a Porky Pete├óÔé¼Ôäós hash brown to his mouth and after a moment of dubious hesitation closed his eyes and pushed it in. It tasted like a mix between potato and cheese. Trent was just grateful that by the time he├óÔé¼Ôäód opened his eyes, Jason would have stolen the other one. Trent clenched his left fist dutifully.
After physics, Trent found he had no more lessons after lunch, so didn├óÔé¼Ôäót have to stay in college for lunchbreak. Rather than hanging round for the social side of lunch, Trent decided to go home. This was mostly because Trent didn├óÔé¼Ôäót believe in the St Lords Social side of lunch, believing it to be just another distant legend he├óÔé¼Ôäód read on the prospectus all that time ago. Trent pushed open the doors from the physics block slowly, behind the rest of the class who had rushed to lunch, and slowly walked the concrete path that went the length of the school to the bus station. It was pretty cold outside, and Trent was wishing not for the first time he had a coat. Being autumn the sun was low even at mid-day, and cast an orange-gold light across the grounds that was almost beautiful and Trent looked about him as he walked to see happy people. People were sitting in groups laughing and talking an enjoying themselves. Trent saw people he knew and looked down on in contempt enjoying each other├óÔé¼Ôäós company and felt an ache in his stomach and looked away. He knew he was missing something important and it was damaging his ability to talk to people. Only Ignorance made being such an outsider painless Trent thought and forced himself to ignore his surroundings. Swerving to avoid people walking the other way automatically and squinting when the sun blazed from gaps between buildings, Trent started to mentally list things he was going to need to investigate the drug operations at the old factory grounds. An obvious first would be concealment. The drug business only really gets started when it was gets dark down there so black clothing would do for the body, a long sleeved top maybe black fingerless gloves for the hands as a good mix between concealment and dexterity├óÔé¼┬ª charcoal could do it for the face and that should be fine. First goal should just to be check the place out and scout the rest of Barnwell for all drug hotspots├óÔé¼┬ª Like the caravan road for example, there├óÔé¼Ôäós blatantly something crooked going on down there├óÔé¼┬ª shouldn├óÔé¼Ôäót need a weapon, camouflage and darkness and darkness should ensure a clear run and if I├óÔé¼Ôäóm spotted to them I├óÔé¼Ôäóm just some guy in the dark. Invisible. Safe, thought Trent, for now.
Trent looked up and felt a certain satisfaction as he walked back out the red brick arch entrance to St Lords and Squinting against the orange blaze of the increasingly low sun, Trent managed to stagger into the shade of the trees by the bus stop and as his eyes adapted back to the gloom, he spied a familiar figure amidst the cluster of people waiting.
├óÔé¼┼ôHey Scotty!├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent hailed, slouching out of the Shadowy Tree line. Scotty was stood leaning his back lazily on the Bus lean-to and nodded with recognition.
├óÔé¼┼ôAlright Trent. How├óÔé¼Ôäós St lords man?├óÔé¼┬Ø
Scotty looked cheerful as ever. His friendly face was in a big grin and he stuck a thumb up as he spotted Trent. He didn├óÔé¼Ôäót have many distinguishing features, being short, stocky, straight brown haired and wearing a nondescript skate branded hoody. He wasn├óÔé¼Ôäót too clever, but he was so friendly and good natured he coped fine with this mild handicap, so long as no writing is involved. Scotty was one of the few people Trent really respected.
├óÔé¼┼ôUh, Pretty good, it was almost bearable today. How├óÔé¼Ôäós JCC?├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent relaxed his back on the lean-to next to Scotty and looked skyward tiredly as he spoke. Scotty looked across at Trent who was standing with his eyes closed against the bus stop with one hand clenched and twitching.
├óÔé¼┼ôSt Lords can├óÔé¼Ôäót be so bad dude, it beats working right? You look pretty busted up.├óÔé¼┬Ø
Trent pulled his head back off the lean-to, opened his eyes and smoothed out his crumpled shirt bearing the legend ├óÔé¼┼ôMario and Luigi, Cleaning your pipes since ├óÔé¼╦£92├óÔé¼┬Ø before slowly replying.
├óÔé¼┼ôYeah its not that bad I guess. Just had a great day. Almost got a whooping in the crapper from some trendy bastard just earlier. Busted up?├óÔé¼┬Ø
Scotty shrugged and asked interestedly ├óÔé¼┼ôfight in the crapper?├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôYeah some trendy nice boy picked a fight with me. I distracted him and bust out the door before he turned back around. 10/10 for style huh?├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôOwnage├óÔé¼┬Ø agreed Scotty ├óÔé¼┼ôI guess fighting wasn├óÔé¼Ôäót your scene huh?├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôHey, I got in a fight that other time to help you guys remember?├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent replied defensively
├óÔé¼┼ôHe was a year seven. Half your height.├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôNo way, he was proper dangerous. Had his evil little gang right?├óÔé¼┬Ø
Scotty frowned in thought.
├óÔé¼┼ôWeren├óÔé¼Ôäót they in Scoram that day?
├óÔé¼┼ôDude!├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent sighed, ├óÔé¼┼ôI would have taken him on even if there was a chance I might lose. It was just a good demonstration of my tactical prowess that I didn├óÔé¼Ôäót├óÔé¼┬Ø
Scotty grinned and glanced down the road to check for busses.
├óÔé¼┼ôYeah. JCC was good. Its really cool, I don├óÔé¼Ôäót understand how you cant be enjoying college.├óÔé¼┬Ø
JCC was the lower grade College that had low entry requirements and a relaxed attitude, where most of Trent├óÔé¼Ôäós old friends now went. All of them exclaimed how great it was on a daily basis, which Trent instantly deleted from his memory in denial.
├óÔé¼┼ôHah, me neither. Hey, Bus is here.├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent added with a nod. Scotty pushed himself off the bus stop gripped Trent├óÔé¼Ôäós shoulder in Brotherly way.
├óÔé¼┼ôC├óÔé¼Ôäómon man lets get on home.├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent rubbed his eyes tiredly and nodded.
├óÔé¼┼ôBangin├óÔé¼Ôäó.├óÔé¼┬Ø
The bus was like most others in the public domain. It had a chipped and rusted blue and white exterior, two stories and a frayed advertising banner across each side. The seats were a metal frame with two faded red green or blue dusty pillows providing the seat and backrest.
There is always a constant breeze from where the windows cant shut properly and a constant smell of cigarette smoke around despite the ├óÔé¼┼ôNo smoking├óÔé¼┬Ø signs. Trent stomped up the bus stairs after Scotty and fell into the next seat with a puff of dust and a contented sigh. The backs of the seats were only about two foot high so it was easy to talk to people behind you, and as a result of this and the weak sunlight keeping everyone awake meant the bus home was one of the few social moments in an St Lords day. Trent shuffled back on his seat and looked up as more people he knew tramped up the stairs.
├óÔé¼┼ôAlright boss├óÔé¼┬Ø Jonnie B nodded with a grin and fell into the chair in front of Trent in puff of dust, closely followed by Haley, Reece and Naomi who sat down on chairs around them, forming a huddle with Scotty in the middle. He really is a social magnet mused Trent as Scotty nodded to everyone sitting down in turn with a ├óÔé¼┼ôHey├óÔé¼┬Ø ├óÔé¼┼ôalright├óÔé¼┬Ø ├óÔé¼┼ôlads├óÔé¼┬Ø. Trent leant back on his rucksack, which he├óÔé¼Ôäód jammed in the gap between the seat and bus to make a pillow, as Reece leant forward into the circle. He had terrible Breath and hygiene, and Trent instinctively couldn├óÔé¼Ôäót have his face within a meter of Reece├óÔé¼Ôäós without intense feelings of distress.
├óÔé¼┼ôHow├óÔé¼Ôäós things at lords then?├óÔé¼┬Ø Reece drawled lazily.
├óÔé¼┼ôYeah its alright thanks, had a fight in the crapper earlier so must have been good.├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôHa! Sounds awesome. Did you win?├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôUh├óÔé¼┬ª├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent hesitated ├óÔé¼┼ôActually, I escaped at the last second because I was outnumbered.├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôMore like you didn├óÔé¼Ôäót want to mess up your hair├óÔé¼┬Ø Chirped Haley from somewhere behind him.
├óÔé¼┼ôHa! Not that it needs it. Do you style it?├óÔé¼┬Ø added Reece with a grin.
Trent stopped fixing Haley with an indignant glare and redirected it to Reece.
├óÔé¼┼ôCan it faggot, I just wear a hat in the mornings and it looks pro. Least I got style. Unlike some├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent added over Haley├óÔé¼Ôäós conspicuous snort of derision.
├óÔé¼┼ôTo be honest, I think having long hair is a bit girly anyway Trent. Most men have their hair short. Most respectable men.├óÔé¼┬Ø Jonnie B sniffed and glanced at the grimy window for his fat reflection. Trent rolled he eyes.
├óÔé¼┼ôWithout meaning to sound arrogant or mean, I don├óÔé¼Ôäót think you guys have any right to give me fashion tips now or ever. Why are you discussing the preferred hairstyle of the outgoing gentleman? Hairstyles? Are we going to talk about what perfume we wear next?├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent exclaimed desperately. Reece snorted with laughter and Naomi turned scowling defensively at the slanderous mention of beauty products.
├óÔé¼┼ôFrom that smell, I├óÔé¼Ôäóm guessing none for Trent├óÔé¼┬Ø she said with a grin. Scotty and Reece both guffawed and Trent banged the window with the back of his head a few times.
├óÔé¼┼ôOkay Trent we get it├óÔé¼┬Ø Scotty laughed giving him a playful push from behind and turned to Reece├óÔé¼Ôäós general direction ├óÔé¼┼ôI didn├óÔé¼Ôäót know you got this bus Reece, you doing something tonight?├óÔé¼┬Ø
Trent grinned at Scotty├óÔé¼Ôäós polite inquiring tone. He probably didn├óÔé¼Ôäót give a crap but he sounded like he sincerely cared and that├óÔé¼Ôäós what makes people light up when he talks to them. Trent made note to keep watch of how Scotty spoke to people on the journey to see if there was any behaviour he could emulate. In thought, he turned to look at Reece for his reply. Reece was a friend of Trent├óÔé¼Ôäós, or at least he was once and Trent knew him well. His most notable features were his shoulder length dirty greasy (once) blonde hair and his appalling hygiene. He was likeable enough, quite a few people didn├óÔé¼Ôäót mind him despite his quirks, but Trent didn├óÔé¼Ôäót trust him, never trusted him. His eyes didn├óÔé¼Ôäót smile. There was something cold and sharp gleaming behind his eyes, almost invisible but always there, a quick thinking malice that Trent was wary of. He├óÔé¼Ôäód made sure to never get too close to Reece in the past.
Reece turned to Scotty ├óÔé¼┼ôYeah, I├óÔé¼Ôäóm meeting up with some friends in Barnwell. Got some business.├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôBusiness?├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent Inquired
├óÔé¼┼ôYeah. People owe me money and that.├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôUh huh├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent had a good idea what that meant, ├óÔé¼┼ôWhere├óÔé¼Ôäós your brother? I├óÔé¼Ôäóm guessing he├óÔé¼Ôäós around too?├óÔé¼┬Ø
Reece shrugged ├óÔé¼┼ôHe├óÔé¼Ôäóll be around, he probably came down on his moped├óÔé¼┬Ø
Reece├óÔé¼Ôäós older brother was universally known to be one of the most powerful dealers in the area with many shady connections with various groups of gypsy├óÔé¼Ôäós and suppliers. Trent personally got on with him well enough but he was a friend of Haley├óÔé¼Ôäós older brother, and all that lot├óÔé¼┬ª Trent wanted them off the streets. To feel fear and to stop causing so much damn misery with their drugs and violence
Still, there was nothing to benefit from Reece├óÔé¼Ôäós animosity.
├óÔé¼┼ôAh right, sounds like fun.├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent said dismissively and turned in his seat to catch what Naomi and Haley were talking about.
├óÔé¼┼ô├óÔé¼┬ªAnyway, apparently loads of the girls have all caught it now, and their all going down to the clinic together├óÔé¼┬ª├óÔé¼┬Ø Naomi giggled, ├óÔé¼┼ôHow the hell he managed to get all of them to sleep with him├óÔé¼┬ª├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôUh├óÔé¼┬ª├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent hesitated ├óÔé¼┼ôwhat├óÔé¼┬ªwait├óÔé¼┬ª do I want to ask?├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôAll the Chavs had at a huge party in Scoram, slag├óÔé¼Ôäós like Lucy and Sarah and those lot were there, well-├óÔé¼┼ô
├óÔé¼┼ôYou know Lucy right?├óÔé¼┬Ø Haley butted in.
├óÔé¼┼ôYeah, I hate her. Bets she├óÔé¼Ôäós got STD Plus one.├óÔé¼┬Ø
Naomi giggled again ├óÔé¼┼ôshe does now├óÔé¼┬Ø
Trent grinned at the thought of someone he hated with a STD.
├óÔé¼┼ôWhat happened?├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôWell, big Chav party, you know how inbred it is round here, one guy had something-├óÔé¼┼ô
├óÔé¼┼ôGenera├óÔé¼┬Ø Haley butted in again gleefully.
├óÔé¼┼ô-And he slept with like 20 girls in that one night!├óÔé¼┬Ø
Trent spent several seconds processing this.
├óÔé¼┼ôOne guy slept with-├óÔé¼┼ô
├óÔé¼┼ô20 girls, yes.├óÔé¼┬Ø Haley clarified.
├óÔé¼┼ô-And he had an STD. Ha! HA! That├óÔé¼Ôäós brilliant!├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent exclaimed.
├óÔé¼┼ôTrent. Most of them caught it. So now there├óÔé¼Ôäós a mass outbreak in Scoram as they all sleep around with all the Chavs.├óÔé¼┬Ø Naomi finished.
Trent started to laugh. Scotty turned round from Reece to find out what was so funny and they both laughed. Scotty got on fine with everyone and never got any trouble, but Trent knew Reece spent a lot of time on the night streets, dealing, fighting and stealing├óÔé¼┬ª Not one good bone in his body but plenty of street lore and Trent knew he├óÔé¼Ôäód had trouble from those guys himself. Reece was certainly laughing but it wasn├óÔé¼Ôäót mirth├óÔé¼┬ª it was something dark. Glee at another├óÔé¼Ôäós pain. Trent wasn├óÔé¼Ôäót so sure if it was funny anymore.
The sun was just above the skyline now and having earlier wiped a patch of the window clean with his elbow, Trent was looking lost in thought again towards the burning sky. He├óÔé¼Ôäód made such a bold statement last night├óÔé¼┬ª a resignation that his life was worthless to him, which, Trent though, still rings true. Revenge on people I hate as a motive to live? Maybe not├óÔé¼┬ª Fighting in the night streets, clearing out the parasites, the druggies, the wasters and the people I hate so much? Maybe. If I had a motive. I hate them but I could just escape, a college, a job, a life and it doesn├óÔé¼Ôäót matter. Only, Leered a rebellious part of Trent├óÔé¼Ôäós brain, you don├óÔé¼Ôäót want a life, Cant handle a life can you? You can├óÔé¼Ôäót talk to people, can├óÔé¼Ôäót live off the warmth people draw about themselves with friendship and conversation because you├óÔé¼Ôäóre cold, because you├óÔé¼Ôäóre different. Maybe something is wrong with me, Trent mused, but I can├óÔé¼Ôäót see a bright side. All I can see ahead is a thousand empty hours. How did it come to this?
Trent started as his pocked vibrated, and then again. A text. Trent leant sideways to make his tight pocket accessible and with an effort pulled out his mobile. It was an old Nokia 210, a very sturdy old phone with a grey├óÔé¼ÔÇ£blue scuffed cover, digital screen, green backlight and big depressible buttons. Trent hated the way phones had become a fashion item in recent years, and detested the flip out, colour, tinny music playing flip phones that cost three limbs and broke the first time you dropped them. The way Trent saw it, the Nokia 210 was the very tip of the leading edge of phone technology: indestructible, with a huge battery life. Trent also spent more time than he liked to admit at night playing Snake II when he couldn├óÔé¼Ôäót sleep.
Trent looked at the screen and felt his stomach ache and lungs contract with anticipation as all his attention telescopically tunnelled unto the small green screen.
1 Message Received
Trent felt excitement blast through him and trying to remain calm thumbed the unlock key and waited for it to unlock. Trent├óÔé¼Ôäós biggest Bone to pick with his phone was how long it took to load anything. He tried not be hopeful and pressed the big OK button.
Opening Message...
Please be Erin Trent thought desperately; please be Erin Please Please Please.
Hi Trent, what you doing
Wednesday night? Want to
Come over mine for a
Few hours? Love Erin
Trent├óÔé¼Ôäós perception of his surrounds contracted back to normal and he exhaled, gripped his hands around his phone and closing his eyes. I shouldn├óÔé¼Ôäót go, Trent thought. It├óÔé¼Ôäóll hurt me, don├óÔé¼Ôäót go. Don├óÔé¼Ôäót believe her lies. But Trent couldn├óÔé¼Ôäót help it, for all his attempts to escape he was still in love with Erin. Completely. It didn├óÔé¼Ôäót matter that all that happened at her house was that she took him to pieces word-by-word and derived psychotic pleasure from hauntingly tempting then breaking him over and over. It hurt him more than anything he├óÔé¼Ôäód ever encountered but it also made him feel incredibly alive, if in a dangerously furious and bitter way. He was hooked.
Trent thumbed the big button, opening the reply window and slowly prodded the keys with his index finger.
Ok, I will bike down.
You better be
Grateful woman.
It was a 40-minute bike ride through wind, rain and piercing cold thought Trent angrily, and she knows it. Knows it and loves it. That bitch.
Trent looked up to see Reece watching him closely.
├óÔé¼┼ôSeriously dude, you need to learn to type with your thumb. Typing with your index finger makes you look like such a jackass├óÔé¼┬Ø Reece said after a moment.
Trent looked affronted.
├óÔé¼┼ôIf you complain about the way I press buttons in my phone again I├óÔé¼Ôäóll push them with your face next time├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent warned,
├óÔé¼┼ôSomehow, I don├óÔé¼Ôäót think that sounded as painful as you thought it would when you contrived that up├óÔé¼┬Ø Reece grinned.
├óÔé¼┼ôYeah true├óÔé¼┬Ø Trend conceded ├óÔé¼┼ôNice use of a linguistic term there too.├óÔé¼┬Ø
Reece Grinned and asked ├óÔé¼┼ôWhat are you doing tonight?├óÔé¼┬Ø
Trent thought cautiously before proceeding ├óÔé¼┼ôNot much, might pop down to the shop and guy a beer, get some gaming in.├óÔé¼┬Ø Reece was an incredible gamer, and at the last LAN party had spanked everyone hands down, so this was not lost on him.
├óÔé¼┼ôI├óÔé¼Ôäóll still kick yo ass. Well, if you get bored and want to forget your troubles I├óÔé¼Ôäóm around yeah?├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôYeah okay, I├óÔé¼Ôäóll remember that.├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent gauged Reece├óÔé¼Ôäós expression curiously. Reece looked around subtly and leaned towards Trent. Trent fought the impulse to lean away and held his breath.
├óÔé¼┼ôI hear things are getting you down. College and that. If you ever need to get stuff off your mind, maybe make an earning├óÔé¼┬ª├óÔé¼┬Ø
Trent was shocked. Reece had never confided his drug dealing habit openly with him before now, much less offered him a position in the business. Trent felt the shadow of a clever observation slipping away from his memory, and focused. The realisation clicked. Reece needs help. Barnwell├óÔé¼Ôäós drug business is getting Bigger.
After a moment Trent leant away keeping his eyes fixed with the penetrating gaze of Reece
├óÔé¼┼ôI├óÔé¼Ôäóll keep that in mind├óÔé¼┬Ø
Reece narrowed his eyes slightly, but the significance was lost as Scotty stood and stepped between them.
├óÔé¼┼ôTrent man this is our stop.├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôHuh? Oh yeah, well, Later Reece.├óÔé¼┬Ø Trent said without looking at Reece again, and followed Scotty down the narrow passage to the stairs. There was no doubt now that Reece was one of the enemy.
Trent Trudged down the muddy alley with Scotty much like he├óÔé¼Ôäód traversed earlier in the day. Luckily it was drier now but because the sun had now receded below the horizon, light was getting pretty sketchy. Being twilight and with the overhanging trees on both sides of the track, it was near impossible to tell the difference between dirt and mud, and Trent still managed to slip and land on his hands to the endless amusement of Scotty. Scotty├óÔé¼Ôäós house backed unto the alley quite near the main road and they soon reached his yard. Trent gave Scotty a cynical salute as he stopped at his back gate.
Scotty turned to unlock it but then turned back to Trent.
├óÔé¼┼ôTrent!├óÔé¼┬Ø He called
Trent turned as he walked and started walking backwards.
├óÔé¼┼ôYeah?├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôI think Reece is my little brothers dealer!├óÔé¼┬Ø Scotty shouted, upset and oblivious to his surroundings.├óÔé¼┼ôDon├óÔé¼Ôäót shout that so close to your house man! I├óÔé¼Ôäóll ask about it!├óÔé¼┬Ø
├óÔé¼┼ôThanks man!├óÔé¼┬Ø Scotty turned and walked through his gate.
Scotty├óÔé¼Ôäós little brother was a hard case. A cool guy for someone several years younger and easy to level with, but he was getting mixed with the wrong crowd and it was starting to show. He was starting to get aggressive and need money badly. Scotty and Trent could both read the signs.
Trent turned and started walking forwards again to avoid stepping in too many muddy puddles. Once he├óÔé¼Ôäód cleared the worst of the mud and the foliage above got thinner, Trent looked up at the sky. A dark layer of fast moving grey cloud obscured the stars, though the rising moon could be seen shining through the scum. Trent lowered his head and focused on looking inconspicuous as he stepped unto his road, and the swaggering group of dangerous looking guys with hoodies over their faces who were stalking in the direction of the old factory ground didn├óÔé¼Ôäót even notice him. Its because of this place, Trent thought not for the first time today as he crossed the road towards his house, there├óÔé¼Ôäós no opportunities, no future, nothing better waiting a the end of the tunnel. There├óÔé¼Ôäós nothing to do and nothing to be and one way or another, it├óÔé¼Ôäós destroying us all.
***************************************************
By the way, the italics didnt show up so some parts may be hard to read.- fixed
The first few paragraphs may suck - under fixing
Where light dosnt fall (chapter 1 of a novel under constuct)
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1v0ry_k1ng
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Where light dosnt fall (chapter 1 of a novel under constuct)
Last edited by 1v0ry_k1ng on 03 Nov 2006, 23:50, edited 2 times in total.
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1v0ry_k1ng
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When I infect a population with the writing virus, it soon spreads to envelop most everyone in the community.
You will become one of us! One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us.
You will become one of us! One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us. One of us.
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1v0ry_k1ng
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Guessmyname
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