You may or may not find this amusing,
Posted: 17 Aug 2006, 09:06
The recent hurricanes and gasoline issues are proof of the existence
of a new chemical element. A major research institution has
recently announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet
known to science.
The new element has been named ├óÔé¼┼ôGovernmentium├óÔé¼┬Ø.
Governmentium (Gv) Has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons,
and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons,
which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles
called peons.
Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take over four days to complete.
Governmentium has a normal half-life of 4 years; It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium├óÔé¼Ôäós Mass will actually increase overtime, since each reorganisation will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.
This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass. When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium - an element which radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.
of a new chemical element. A major research institution has
recently announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet
known to science.
The new element has been named ├óÔé¼┼ôGovernmentium├óÔé¼┬Ø.
Governmentium (Gv) Has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons,
and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons,
which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles
called peons.
Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take over four days to complete.
Governmentium has a normal half-life of 4 years; It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium├óÔé¼Ôäós Mass will actually increase overtime, since each reorganisation will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.
This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass. When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium - an element which radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.
the INSTANT a nuclear blast started, coat it in this. You've then got about 50 years to evacuate the area before the blast even gets out of the impact crater