Spring RTS Engine

Due to the recent number of more serious and flamey threads, i have called upon my faithful book of Big Steve Ta wisdom and created a thread that will hopefully put a smile back on the face of the spring community!
cos this place is doing my nut at the moment! hehe

Ok so Ive set aside unlimited e paper below to share your most amusing comm explosion stories. seeing as this is my thread, I shall begin hehe
Everyone sitting comfortably?
...

Ok, it was a dark dark night..and evryone... ah whatever....

This one time I was fighting away on painted desert or somethin (cant really remember )with my comm in the middle, he was doin good... laying the beatdown, phat cigar in mouth and bottle of JD in hand, leaving the other free for d gunning duty... thumping any nasty enemy units that tried to punch through my frontline, unfortunately I hadnt read big Steves big book of ta wisdom that day, my comm had had one slug o' JD too many and hadnt noticed the the enemy massing his airforce...

No probs I thought I whack a couple of defenders and.... oh crap 3 liches... boom, my comm gets nuked... bounces over my hlts and into my shiny new moho geo where he promptly explodes... taking the geo with him... which in turn takes out my level2 kbot lab and lovely 15 strong brawler swarm I just spammed with the sole purpose of popping my enemies girly core commander...
oooof! needless to say... I um... lost that one, but the amusing comm death more than made up for the pasting I then recieved hehe

well i saw one comm football with liches in a replay i posted on the lobby forum.
it was very amusing as well as the comm kept being pushed around the map with huge jumps

it was a cold night in a 6 way ffa on mars, i had decided to just turtle up on my side of the map get lvl tech 2 and just defend myself till the majority had killed themselves then break out.

Well i got stuck in my corner for a long time :) and "just in case" i had built something like 20 flak's in the north west corner and 1 long range missile launcher.

well it turns out someone else did the same thing as me except after his neighbors died he pushed out grabbed all there land, and had built an orcone or 3.

He sent them UP my hill, on the east side of the north spot, and it actually climbed it. So i sent my cloaked com up there before it could devestate my base,

I accidentally placed my com in front of the orcone, so when i dgunned it, the Orcone did the giant explosion, which DIDNT kill my com, just left him with a sliver of health, but actually flung him, RIGHT into my base.

taking out half of my anti air defenses when he exploded against my fusion i was done for in that game.

Lol, i charged a few orcones with my comm. Its all good fun. But one time when i knew my allies and i were gonna lose, we all put our comms in atlas' and launched a final comm bomb assault upon our foes!!! They didn't have much AA so we actually did some good damage before being blown up by the appoaching orcones.

battling it out on cliffdown right

I fly a nuke across the map into my opponents base and see it blow up some major shit and im like, YES right on target. but then i see a little ball flying out of the blast.. what is that??? oh... its my opponents commander... and its headed right back at my base....

soo... his commander ends up blowing up a huge chunk of my base. blasted nukes...

On the mighty lands of metal, where heck flows trough al circuits of machines One brave Arm commanders stood firm in the waves of enemy rushes.
His faithfull weponry which costed many, many lives to create basted life in this part of the galaxy.
Base begain to shape, production on the grow, territory secured.

And it arubtly ended when his mighty D-gun missed and he was sucked away in the eternal darkness of a floating bear and the base was destroyed by it's selfdestruction.

on fizzy lakes I had set up shop right smack dab in the middle.

It was me and deci vs mother and omeone else who for some reason I can't remember.

Well I was doing a beautiful job of massive ak swarming when I saw mothers comm moving towards the middle. I about shit myself, cause I had a lv 2 plant that just got built, and lots of ak's that wern't gonna help. So, I started building crawling bombs. I only had like 45 seconds before his comm would be in the middle. the first bomb made it and launched his conn across to the hill, he bounces off and keeps coming. Bomb # 2 hits, bounce and keeps coming. At that moment deci showed up with atlasses and picked him up and caused him to comm bomb himself lol. It was good tv :D

Another time would be when I killed Guilty's comm using nothing but aks. Funny thing was, I had no idea his comm was even there. I was just scouting and in the process of sending a lot of stuff directly into his base. All of a sudden I hear a big boom and guilty is like "WTF?" over ts. I scrolled over to find out that my ak's had just pecked away at his comm and neither he nor I had even noticed lol.

Funny game on Mountain Siege, I scouted the enmy base and sent two crawling bomds underwater to it, while it was making defenders on the hill. It flew in the air and destroyed the best part of his base.

Dueling Forts.

AA

vs A******k

The enemy had taken the middle spot with commander, first attemps of remove him from there failed vs dgun, and soon after there was 2 Hlts, several defenders, and 1 Guardian, (aswell as some solars dt and the mex) that decimated further attempts of using units agains the possition.

It was matter of time he ammased units back in his base and sent to mine feeble (maybe i had 1 llt) defended one.

Had to act fast and smart... think think think think.

So, i walked some (castro?) radar jammers till i was inside guardians range (ony high traj on that version), and started my own guardian, very quiet so he would not nottice.

Once finished the guardian, i sent my remainig troops (lvl1) as spotters/softeners, and proceeded to bombard enemys defense array, starting for its very own plasma cannon. Once that was done, killing the hlts and rest of stuff was being piece of cake, until..

yep, his commander was walking from the remainings of the outpost, straigth to my heroic guardian...

tried to walk my commander back to base.. but that was even worst, as his dying commander caugth mine with his explotion and mine caugth my lvl1 lab.. all that was left were mexes and solars in my side, end of the game for me.

what we learned today kids?

NEVER walk a dying (or soon to die) commander into YOUR OWN BASE.

walk it towards the attacking units.

e: just for making clear it was the most amusing story evar, the castro radar jammers are lvl1 structures in aa, so i had to build several till i was in range.
Now amuse even more little fellows.

One time on 4 Sculls Kuro TA 3v3, the enemy was pushing all the way to the middle hill on our side of the map... I sent out the 10 or so AKs I had at the time...

I ran his health down to almost 0 and thought it was the end... but either the force of the explosion or the little bits of scrap from the detonation of my final unit's death finished him off...

I remebear a pretty funny game...

Me and Min3mat vs Comp1337 (or someone with "1337" in their name) and is unknow ally on lava highground.


Min3mat qwickly takes controll over the middle, and i takeing it a litthe slower comes to after a while. Being happy and disscussing ways of attacking in short messages, we suddenly notice a HLT bye comp1337 being built close enougth to destory alot of mexxes and posibly a second lab( i think i was building level 2 k-bots).

Anyway, it was begining to become finished, bye a con and his com. So min3mat starts walking towards his commander, witch flees with it's con leaving the HLT to be destoryed. Now min3mat follows the commander into the base, while Comp1337 begging him to not since it will ruin the game and such and such. Evuntaly he walks into the middle of his own base and someone d-guns the other and bam! nothing but a couple of solars.

His freind qwickly get rooted out bye level 2 k-bots. (A couple of crawling bombs took care of his popup i think....), and After the match, Comp wants a rematch.


We start the match (this time on comet catcher) and after just a phew minutes, comp1337 combombs min3mat! Min3mat aint really that angry about it and i give him a con to start building mexxs. we controll most of the upper half of the map, sharing 80% resouces and hold on vs them both for qwite a while ( i think they have time to build a medium sized Pyro army to really kill our mexxes good) untill we finaly die.


We then enter the server lobby furios discussion rambles on. Comp1337 says he proved his point and says it to min3mat, min3mat defends his position, they go out in a sissy poo trowing contest, i argue that the game was the funniest of many games i've ever played for a while, and his nameless ally agrees with Comp1337.


hehe... (XTA btw)

to late for a essay - but hitting zenka's comm with 7 cruise missiles one after the other on metal heck just to make sure he died (his comm had a stupid amount of hp through exp) was hilarious, his comm actually survived all 7 (i think 5 hit, and the last 2 made him fly off the map), but his comm sorta flew off the map for what seemed like ages before i think it hit a wall and died. he must have been flying around the map out of the boundaries for about 10secs was crazy

@Kixxe: I think I remeber being the unknown ally in that game... and the ensueing whinage... I statred in the upper left corner and started pushing into the middle with my com... heh... I thing he got popped in the middle and took out everything that had got built in there... would have been an awfully long time ago...

lol funky, I was speccing that game.... hilarious watching zenkas comm floating around bouncing off stuff lol

I was specing a speedmetal game the other day and someone's comm was tossed by a crawling bomb. There was a bunch of sammies near by that proceeded to drill the hell out of the comm as he flew around helplessly in mid air. I don't think he died, but mid air fire was the difference between an orange bar comm when he landed and a red sliver.

funny game that one. weird thing is that me and comp have been fine since, guess we got the shit slinging out of the way ^-^

I was playing 4v4 with com ends setting, all my teammates died, then i was playing 1v4 and i was winning!, then after a while.... and suddenly... BOOM!!!!! Game ends. I lost. (comflybomb)

That was sad

in a dark dark land known as comet catcher. i had had problems defending from rushes in the begining as i had decided to rush to lvl 2. i finally managed it, but was pinned down. i build many fusions (making use of my secret mouse button 5 in fact my mouse has 8 buttons and a wheel... for what purpose i still dont know) my comm with beer belly and trucker cap aided the building of my 12th-ish fusion, which i were ammassing to eventually power a vulcan but in the meantime power metal makers. i had the mobile fusions cowering in the corner.. when..

a handful of bombers catch me unawares (the enamy seemed to be going with kbots) i had only lvl 1 AA.. the bombers where killed ... but. they killed 1 mobile fusion.. which ignited another and another.. a few moments of blinding dominos later and my commander is flying halfway accross the map where he explodes.
THE END

Early game, a flash scout ran in the general direction of my commander, I ordered the flash d-gunned...

... and my comm managed to hit himself.

Anyone rembear my old complaint thread about the V hotkey?

[21:17:21] <Kixxe> WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[21:17:30] <BigSteve> ?
[21:17:45] <Kixxe> Okay, the fucking all sucky "Video hotkey:V" needs to go!
[21:17:54] <Kixxe> I just played, mmh kay?
[21:17:59] * wazzza is eating brain
[21:18:01] <BigSteve> hehe
[21:18:20] <Kixxe> Tried to find idle com, presseding Ctrl+c does so, pressing ctrl+v on the other hand
[21:18:34] * wazzza likes brains
[21:18:35] <Kixxe> It brouthg up some sucky shit and made the game a mess
[21:18:43] * wazzza is very inteligent
[21:18:46] <BigSteve> just press v again
[21:18:47] <Kixxe> THEN i wanted to write "I hate the V command"
[21:18:54] <Kixxe> Under the UBER LAG
[21:19:05] <BigSteve> i think that works if you press v again
[21:19:10] <Kixxe> But it seams, thanks to lag, that CTRL was pushed in
[21:19:11] <BigSteve> it cancels it
[21:19:17] <BigSteve> ah
[21:19:18] <BigSteve> hmmm
[21:19:29] <Kixxe> So, Ctrl A and ctrl d made all my units blow up
[21:19:35] <BigSteve> lol
[21:19:44] <Kixxe> And then TAspring treaw an error and crashed
[21:19:47] <Kixxe> YAY
[21:19:59] <Kixxe> Okay, no error, but it crashed
[21:20:00] <Kixxe> Bam
[21:20:05] <Kixxe> I did'nt push ESC
[21:20:26] <Kixxe> So now, im proposing to take the V command to F11 or something
[21:20:31] <Kixxe> Volia, problem solevd
[21:26:16] <Dynamoe2> 1 more for Mars
[21:26:31] <Kixxe> meh, im gonna go post a treadh bout this shit

hehe